緊記: 所有事也是因果循環的

Well every single tings happen for a cause ... well so that to earn something gd in return ? hopefully as the title say.
Well going to be 4 month without her, how time past ... well still kind of lost and no motivation for sure but at least now consolation do work better for me now, told myself to get back wat i lost, or i guess i juz wana prove something out there .. that i can live without her and well maybe hopping for another miracle to happen ... i really duno ..nuts abt anything for now .. but i do know i wana gain back my confident and the thing i tend to lost to provide maybe a better life for me or even for my family ...
Sadly recently all unhappy things coming one by one, and it really sadden my heart, blaming the sky and earth and etc la ...why this why that .. what did i really do wrong ... i really realize till today, being trueful and being good don't really gain me anything but maybe a clear heart, but well human r selfish by nature, at the end of the day, we do hope for at least some rebate and returns .... be it friends or anything ... i really guess i have become more self center, hopping to gain more attendtion and etc in way .. lonely sign i guess .. or well i guess i bottom too many things in me myself ...
And to make thing worst, i really do miss her, i have so much to tell her and how bad i need her to be by my side, i always day dream, sitting by my sofa and then i see her appear on my doorstep, heh native ....
For now, i really hate to take the first step, always be the one to start, always be the one to care, to concern, to be trueful and etc ... and guess writing is the only thing for me now to bitch and complain and at the end of the day, who knows, who care ... Zzzz
For once in writing, i can behave like a small kid to throw my temper and juz write watever things is on my mind ..... but back to life, i know i will always be the Nice Guy to be ... a satisfy Guy to be ... seeing life, being though the worst stage, always tinking, always being senstive .... and to know wat i really wan in life.
But well guess thats me ... but i really feel so tired and when i will deserve wat i wan ....
I know wat i wan as my MSN nick say .. i will get back wat i lost .... i will work hard for my future to be .. holding her in my memories and heart ....always wishing her, praying the best for her always ...

May eveyone be bless with all the good companions in life ...

Hmm i duno wat i writing also ... lol well to be continue and explain once i figure that out on my life then ...